We Are Broken
by nerdygirlx
Summary: KT Rush and Fabian Rutter were very happy once. After graduating from boarding school and escaping all the madness those days had brought them, they settled down with two people whom they really cared about. But one day, they receive terrible news that turns their worlds upside down. The two best friends cling to each other for support, but can they get over their loss? Kabian.
1. Chapter 1

KT Rush got the phone call first.

She was sitting at her secretary desk, waiting patiently for something to do, when the phone rang. However, it wasn't the work phone, as she had suspected. It was her phone. That was odd in itself, because when at work, it was very rare that she had to deal with personal calls. She didn't recognize the number, but thought nothing of it, answering the call and raising her phone to rest between her shoulder and her ear as she tapped away at her computer.

"Hello?" she asked, her voice cheerful and somewhat concentrated. "Sorry, if this isn't important, I may have to ask that you call me back later." She said, her voice still in professional mode. That happened when she was working – she always felt the need to talk like a posh person. But people often doubted her when they recognized her American accent, bleeding through and immediately making her different. The American girl at the big English company.

"Miss Rush?" a stern voice asked, and KT frowned slightly. Briefly, she wondered who'd spat in the man's cereal that morning, but nonetheless, she remained polite and composed.

"Yes, that's me. Who is this?" she asked.

"I'm sorry, I'm afraid I have some very bad news." The man said. "I'm Officer Harvington. I'm afraid your partner – Mr Miller – is dead."

KT felt faint and her head began to spin. Her hand came up to hold the phone to her ear properly, letting her shoulder drop. "Wh-what?" she asked, praying that this was Eddie's sick idea of a joke. Or maybe one of his friends, or his brother, were pranking her. They weren't the nicest of people. She prayed that this wasn't real. She had to wake up any second...

But the pain rushing over her was real.

"I'm very sorry. You'll have to come to the police station for us to tell you further. We'll be here until 7PM." Office Harvington told her.

"R-right, I'll be there soon..." KT said faintly. She wasn't in a good enough state to ask questions. The man hung up and she put her phone down slowly, unable to believe what she'd just been told. She found herself thinking back to that morning, when she'd last seen Eddie.

" _KT, there's something we should definitely talk about." Eddie said, as he watched his girlfriend rushing about the apartment, searching for her keys._

" _What's up?" she asked, glancing towards him briefly before continuing her search for her car keys. "Dammit, where the hell are my keys?"_

 _Eddie held them up, jangling them. She turned towards him, a smile playing on her lips as she sat on the chair opposite his, leaning forward to take her keys. "Okay, what did you want to talk about?" KT asked again, this time giving him her full attention._

 _He leaned across and took her hands in his, and KT's heart fluttered as though she were a schoolgirl again. "I think...I think I want to have a family."_

 _Her eyes widened in surprise. They'd discussed this before, of course, but she hadn't thought Eddie would be ready for a long time. KT wanted kids – whether it was now or in the future – and she was willing to wait for Eddie if that was what he wanted. But this was definitely a surprise._

" _Now?" she asked._

" _Yeah." He replied, with a grin._

" _Eddie, you don't have to...not on my account...I mean, if you want to wait, then you know that I'm okay with that." KT said sincerely, giving his hands a squeeze and smiling reassuringly._

" _I know." Eddie replied softly. "But I don't want to wait any more. I love you, KT Rush. I want a family with you. And who knows, maybe one day, you'll be KT Miller."_

 _KT considered, a grin gracing her features. "Kinda has a ring to it." She teased._

" _It'll have two rings to it, actually." Eddie joked cheekily._

" _You're the worst."_

" _You love it."_

" _Unfortunately, yes."_

 _KT smiled and leaned across, kissing him softly. "I'm glad you changed your mind, then."_

" _So, y'know what this means?" Eddie smirked, as she got up and put on her coat._

" _What?" KT asked, raising her eyebrows._

" _More sex."_

" _You're literally unbelievable." KT rolled her eyes, but she laughed all the same, a sparkle in her eyes. Eddie's eyes suddenly softened, and he got up, his hands palming her waist as he kissed her softly._

" _I love you." He said seriously, leaning his forehead against hers. "More than anything in the world. You know that, right?"_

" _So you love me more than food?" KT teased._

 _Eddie laughed. "I'm serious, Kara."_

" _Don't call me that!" KT exclaimed, groaning slightly and shaking her head. "I hate you."_

" _No you don't." Eddie smirked._

" _You're right, I don't." She agreed, pinching his arm._

" _Ow!" he said indignantly._

" _That's what you get for being an ass." She laughed._

" _KT."_

" _What?"_

" _I love you."_

" _That's the most 'I love you's I've ever heard you say in the space of five minutes. Did you break something?"_

" _Just say it back, dweeb."_

" _I love you too. You knew that, though."_

 _Eddie smiled at her goofily and kissed her once more. "Now go. You'll be late for work. Your boss won't forgive you for that."_

" _You're right." KT laughed._

" _She's a bitch."_

" _Don't I know it."_

" _I think you should quit."_

" _How can we pay the rent if I quit?"_

" _I'll still be working."_

" _Eddie, I'm not quitting my job. Not yet. I just...wanna figure out what I want to do first." KT said._

" _I guess that's okay. Just don't let that woman walk all over you, okay? You don't owe her anything." He warned._

" _I won't." She laughed. "I'll just remind myself that if I disobey you, you'll ignore me for two weeks."_

" _KT, that was one time."_

" _Yeah, and it was only because I said your soccer – sorry, football – team are terrible!"_

" _They're not terrible!" Eddie defended. "You're wasting time. Go."_

" _See you later. Are you gonna be home later tonight?" KT inquired, grabbing her bag and making sure her keys were safely in her hand._

" _I don't think so." Eddie said, shaking his head. "I'll let you know if I am. What's for dinner?"_

" _Um, I was thinking pizza? We could just get a delivery and watch some movies or whatever." KT suggested._

" _Sounds good. And then we can get babymaking."_

 _KT laughed, rolling her eyes. "Sure. See you later, okay?"_

" _Have a good day, babe." Eddie smiled._

" _You too, dork." She called back, as she left the house._

 _She was grinning like an idiot all the way to work._

Now, sitting at her desk, the news slowly began to sink in and KT felt horribly sick. She stood up, her stomach doing queasy flips.

"KT, what's wrong?" her co-worker (and close friend), Joy, asked her.

"Eddie..." she whispered, and that's all she could get out before she bolted into the bathroom and leaned over one of the toilets, throwing up. Her hair was being held back, and when she stopped throwing up, she noted that it was Joy.

She cleaned herself up and turned to face her friend, who was watching her expectantly, waiting for an explanation.

"It's Eddie...he's..." KT winced.

"What did he do this time?" Joy asked immediately.

"N-nothing...it's..."

She couldn't get the words out. Joy looked worried now, and KT knew she owed her an explanation for just bolting like that. She trusted Joy – they'd known each other for a long time.

"Eddie's dead."


	2. Chapter 2

Fabian Rutter got the call shortly afterwards.

He was sitting at home, flipping through the newspaper. He had the day off, for once, and he was enjoying it. It'd only be better if Nina Martin, his fiancée, would come home just a bit faster. She'd said she was on her way about an hour ago. She should have been here by now, but he refused to worry, knowing that she'd get irritated at him for that.

He put the newspaper down and got up, his eyes scanning his surroundings. The living room was small, but very warm and colourful. He smiled slightly. His eyes found the photos on the mantelpiece and he picked one up, examining it.

It was easily his favourite photo; it was him and his best friends, standing outside the boarding school they were just graduating from. There was him and Eddie Miller – his roommate and the guy he always turned to – first, then beside Eddie stood his then-girlfriend, Patricia (she acted like a witch at times but, getting past that, you'd find a heart of gold) and next to her stood Alfie Lewis, the class clown who was much braver than most people thought. Then, beside Fabian, there was KT Rush – the magical girl who had stars in her eyes and could almost hold the galaxy in the palm her hand. That's how he always used to see her.

He saw KT and Eddie the most often – the happy couple were very close with him and Nina – but he'd rather like to meet up with all of them. He knew that Alfie and Patricia had decided to get together, but they were taking a long holiday in Ireland, while he, Nina, KT and Eddie were all living in London.

He'd like to meet up with everyone from his old school – well, those from Anubis House, at least. He'd missed them. He knew that KT was still very close friends with Joy, but he hadn't seen her much as of late. Perhaps he'd ask Eddie or KT for her number, and they could catch up.

As he thought about that, his phone rang. He pulled it out of his pocket and didn't bother checking the number. He answered immediately, tearing his eyes away from the picture somewhat reluctantly. "Hello?" he asked.

"Mr Rutter?" a man's voice asked. He sounded somewhat sorrowful, which made Fabian immediately suspicious.

"That's me..." Fabian replied slowly, a frown gracing his features. A thought in the back of his mind wondered where Nina was – she definitely should have been home by now. Her work had finished two hours ago. He knew she'd gone to pick up some shopping, but that wouldn't have taken long either. Maybe she'd met up with some friends? Although, she probably would have told him.

"I'm very sorry. I have some bad news." The man said.

Panic curled into Fabian's gut and his heart began to thud. "Who is this?" he asked.

"My name is Officer Jenkins." He replied. "I'm a policeman."

"Right...what's this...news?" Fabian inquired, his heart beating even faster as his stomach seemed to twist into knots. In the back of his mind, an idea popped up, but he shoved it back violently, refusing to think about that even for a second.

"Your partner, Miss Martin, is dead." Officer Jenkins replied.

Immediately, everything came to a screeching halt, and Fabian's whole world seemed to crash and burn around him as he stood, frozen, his entire body beginning to shake. "No, no, there must be some mistake..." he began.

"I'm very sorry. We identified the bodies and..." Officer Jenkins began.

"Bodies?" he asked. "I thought you said Nina-"

"There were two casualties, sir. I'm afraid we cannot discuss this over the phone. We'll be open until 7PM. Are you able to make it down before then so that we can explain the situation?" the policeman asked.

"Yes...yes, of course." Fabian replied.

"We'll see you soon, sir." Officer Jenkins said, and he hung up.

Fabian's phone dropped from his hand. It had a safe landing on the sofa, but he wasn't paying attention to that just yet. His entire world was turning upside down and he found himself in shock and disbelief. Nina? His Nina? She was dead? She couldn't be, there had to be a mistake...

But he knew. He knew there wasn't a mistake. There couldn't be. He slowly sank down onto the sofa, picking up his phone from beside him. But who could he call? He couldn't call Nina, clearly, and who else was there? Eddie would be at work, so he couldn't exactly call him...

KT, maybe? She would be at work too, but...she'd just be finishing about now, right? He wasn't entirely sure, but before he could stop himself, his fingers were tapping away at the dial pad and he was putting the phone up to his ear, waiting as the dull dialling tone rang out. He was still shaking, and he felt numb, although there was an ache gnawing at his heart that he knew wasn't going to go away any time soon.

There was a click and Fabian hoped for the best, but he'd been directed to KT's voicemail. Cursing, he waited until the beep sounded out and he began to speak.

"KT, it's...it's Fabian." He paused, drawing in a deep breath as he wondered how much he could really tell her over a voicemail. "L-look, I'm sorry if this...got you in trouble at work or anything, b-but I didn't know who else to call...look, something's happened, and...I—I can't really tell you over voicemail. I need to head down to the police station and...it'd be really great if you could maybe meet me there? I'm sorry, I know this is short notice, and I understand if you can't, but...I'll be there in about half an hour. I'll explain if you can come. So, uh. Bye."

He hung up and let his head fall into his hands for a moment. He felt like he wanted to cry, needed to, but he couldn't get the tears out. It was as though it hadn't sunk in yet. He needed time. But time was exactly what he didn't have right then.

He slowly stood up, putting his phone in his pocket. He fumbled around the living room, searching for his keys, before finding them under his jacket. He put his jacket on and quickly walked outside to his car. He still found it hard to believe that it was Nina. There had to be some kind of mistake. He was determined that there was a mistake. There had to be. She couldn't be dead. There was no way.

As soon as he got into his car, however, it really, properly hit him – Nina was dead. There was no way in hell there could be any kind of mistake. She was known by a lot of people. She could be identified quickly and easily, and not just because of her face, but because she always carried some form of identification with her. There wasn't a single way that they'd got it wrong.

Tears formed in Fabian's eyes but he wiped them away. He wanted to cry, of course he did, but for now he had to stay strong. He had to know for sure what exactly he was dealing with. Drawing in a deep breath once again, he started up his car and he began to drive, hoping and praying that KT would actually turn up.

He knew it sounded horribly pathetic, but he couldn't do this alone – and he really didn't want to.


	3. Chapter 3

Little did Fabian know, KT was already headed to the police station. It wasn't until she'd parked outside and checked her phone that she realized she'd missed a call.

She listened to his message and decided that she'd wait for him, seeing as she needed someone to be here with her. Joy had offered to go with her, but KT had declined. She loved Joy to bits, but she didn't know Eddie the way KT did. The way Fabian did.

KT waited outside of the police station nervously. She hadn't cried yet, although hell, she wanted to. There was a dull ache in her bones that wouldn't go away and she just felt...numb. She needed to be sure that this was real before she let herself break down about it.

When she saw Fabian's car pulling up, immediately, emotion broke through her numb shell and the minute he was out of his car she flung herself into his arms, burying her face into his shoulder. She still wasn't going to cry, but she needed this. Fabian's arms wrapped around her, even if he was a little confused. He stepped back, holding her at arm's length, and he looked her over carefully, trying to figure her out.

It dawned on him when he saw the sad look in her eyes.

It dawned on her at the exact same moment.

Their eyes widened. KT's hand came up to cover her mouth. Fabian's hand went down to take her free one in his, lacing their fingers together. Without a single word, they walked into the police station.

"Mr Rutter? Miss Rush?" someone inquired.

They both nodded mutely. Neither could muster up the strength to speak just yet.

"Officer Jenkins and Officer Harvington are through there." The woman said, gesturing into an office.

KT bit her lip and looked at Fabian, her eyes full of a sorrow that only he could fully understand. He gently squeezed her fingers and she nodded. Still as silent as they had been for those few minutes, they headed into the office. Two policemen were standing there, serious looks on their faces. One of them closed the door and gestured for the two to sit down.

They did. But their hands didn't part. If anything, they just held on tighter.

"We're very sorry for your loss." One of them said. "I'm Officer Jenkins, this is officer Harvington. We just want to ask you a few questions."

"How the hell did this happen?" KT asked, her voice quiet.

"The two were riding in a car together. A lorry flunked past a red light. Hit them full on. They were dead instantly." Harvington said bluntly.

The image that came to KT's head was enough to bring tears to her eyes. Fabian looked over at her, squeezing her hand tightly, although tears were brimming in his eyes too.

"Where were they headed? Do either of you know?" Jenkins inquired, more gently than Harvington had been speaking.

KT shook her head. "I didn't even know they'd be meeting..." she murmured.

"Neither did I." Fabian sighed.

"Eddie was supposed to be going to a meeting today..." KT sighed.

"Yeah, Nina was too." Fabian agreed.

"So they were headed to the same meeting." Harvington huffed, clearly bored. "Are you sure you know nothing else?"

"I'm pretty sure I would know if anything else important was going on." KT growled.

"Easy." Fabian murmured. "Sir, I'm sorry, but this is hardly the time to be questioning us. That's what we know, that's the best either of you will get, and it's all we can give."

"You're right. Again, we're sorry for your loss." Jenkins said.

Two bags were placed in front of them.

"This is what we recovered from the wrecked cars. They belonged to your partners. You can do with them what you wish." Jenkins told them.

"Aren't you going to need these for evidence?" Fabian asked.

"We don't need evidence. This wasn't a murder, nor a mystery." Harvington said, his voice monotone. "Two people died. That's all."

"That's all?" KT exclaimed, slamming her hands on the desk as she got up. "Try to be a little more respectful! We have lost two people we love. Don't act as though it's just like a fly or an ant dropping dead. They meant something to us, and what you think is irrelevant. I'll thank you to hold your tongue about them and just get on with your job!"

Harvington looked rather stunned. KT snatched up the bag and fled from the office, tears blurring her vision. She felt people's eyes on her as she pushed her way through the police station door, the cold air hitting her face. She barely had time to react to that, however. As soon as she was outside, she fell to her knees, her body trembling as sobs finally escaped her system, tears streaming down her face.

She felt Fabian's arms going around her, heard the quiet crying of his own, and she turned around and buried her head in his chest, sobbing and clinging to him as though afraid he'd disappear from her.

"F-Fabian..." she choked out, peeking up at him through her wet eyelashes. Seeing his tears only made her sob more. He rocked her back and forth, not seeming to care that people were staring.

"I know." He murmured, his voice broken and cracked. " _I know_ , KT."

She leaned against him and kept sobbing. They stayed there for a long while, holding each other.

Nothing could be said to make it better.

* * *

KT and Fabian drove back to his place, although hell, it wasn't a good idea. The pictures of them all around the place only made them feel worse. But they couldn't be alone, they knew that.

They ended up curled up on the sofa, a movie playing in the background although neither of them were paying attention to it. Fabian's arms around her was, perhaps, the only thing keeping KT from falling to pieces. Although it felt as if she was breaking, he was holding her together.

Tears ran down both of their faces, although not as much as before.

"Fabian." KT whispered.

"KT." He replied, his own voice low.

"Eddie...Nina..."

"I know." He whispered.

"Why...why did this have to happen to them? They never did anything wrong...they didn't deserve this..." KT whimpered.

He kissed her head, tears falling down his face as he squeezed his eyes shut. "I know, KT. It isn't fair."

"What did we ever do, Fabian? Why do bad things happen to us? All of us...Sibuna...why can we never be happy?" she asked.

"That's not true. We can be." Fabian murmured.

"We always lose people we care about, Fabes. Even if they don't..." she shuddered, unable to say the word. "They leave. They distance themselves from us. They forget us. Why can we never just be happy?"

Fabian's hand found hers and he laced their fingers together. "I don't know." He whispered.

"We couldn't even be happy for a minute. Life couldn't let that happen." KT said bitterly.

"KT, maybe...maybe it's not about being happy for your whole life. Maybe...maybe it's about the moments." Fabian murmured.

There was a silence between them and Fabian wondered if he'd said the wrong thing.

"How are you so okay?" KT asked. "How...how do you do that? I want to learn. Because right now I feel like I'm about to fall apart."

"I'm not." Fabian whispered.

KT looked at him, really looked, and noted that he was right. His eyes were red from crying. He was very pale, and his body was shaking. Tears filled his eyes as he realized she was watching him. He looked just as sorrowful as she felt. She felt bad for talking about how she felt. She wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned her head on his chest.

"Tell me." She murmured.

He knew what she meant. "I can't. It makes it more real."

"We don't have a choice but to face it now, Fabes." She whispered, her voice wobbling. "Please. Tell me."

He let out a little laugh, although it was sad, rather than humorous. "It was just such an ordinary day. I was waiting for her to come home. She was late, but I didn't let myself think anything of it...she hated when I did that." Using past tense hurt, but Fabian knew that he had to get used to it. "So...I was just...admiring the picture of us. You, me, Eddie, Patricia and Alfie. Then I got the call. It felt like everything just fell apart around me, KT. It felt like I'd just been snapped in half, then stamped on until I was just...just like glass. In tiny pieces. Unfixable."

"I knew I had to call someone. I knew Eddie would be at work. Or...I thought he would be. I wasn't sure if you would be or not, so I called you. It felt like everything was going wrong, KT. I needed you to be my rock. You've always been my rock. But then when I saw you...when I really looked at you...I realized. That hurt me too. Eddie and Nina were a big part of both our lives and it's so hard to think that they won't be here any more. This house...this house isn't going to feel like home if I'm here every day, remembering everything that happened within these walls. It'll be so hard not to remember her. Every inch of this house has a part of her here. And a part of Eddie, too. You and him spent so much time here yourselves. This house isn't just mine and Nina's. It's yours and Eddie's just as much." Fabian took in a deep breath. She was still listening. She looked up at him, an intense look in her eyes.

"I always thought...I always thought it'd be us four against the world for the rest of our lives. Figured we'd see each other all the time. We'd all have kids and they'd become like family to each other and we'd just...we'd all be happy. We'd grow old together and tell our children the same stories about everything we used to do. Every adventure we've ever had. We'd tell our grandchildren the very same stories. Hell, even the great grandchildren, if we lived long enough. I figured me and Eddie would mutter about stupid kids these days and you and Nina would laugh and knit and search for your little glasses together, forgetting that they were on top of your heads. I'd try to remember all the facts I learned in school and you'd laugh at me when I said something wrong."

"This part is kind of depressing, but...I always imagined that Eddie and Nina would die first. Not – god, that sounds so bad – but it's not the way you're thinking. They'd die of old age after living a good, long life. Then...then it'd just be you and me, trying to move forward together and live to the fullest as much as we could, for however long we had left. We'd be pushed in our wheelchairs to our favourite park and you'd laugh about how you used to climb all those trees with us all those years ago. We'd be visited by our family and we'd tell the same old stories over and over again because they'd never get bored. We'd look at old photographs and try to remember the names and faces and places we've been to. I imagined we'd all travel together too...when we were much younger, I mean...and we'd take lots of photos and make so many memories." Fabian drew in another breath. "It's stupid. Me imagining things like that. Because now...now I feel like that's what caused this."

"Fabian..." KT began.

"Me dreaming of the future so much, planning out almost every detail, has made life think that I was far too confident. So fate changed the way things were going. Decided that I couldn't have that future. Decided that _we_ couldn't have that future, KT. I wanted it more than anything in the world." Fabian continued, tears escaping his eyes as he choked on a sob. "I wanted a family, I wanted to grow old with Nina and you and Eddie by my side. But none of that can happen now. People will say I can have a family, but the fact is, I don't know if I'll ever love anyone as much as I loved Nina."

KT was silent for a moment, taking it all in. She turned around so that her back was to Fabian, and his arms wrapped around her waist almost automatically. She leaned back against him, more tears welling up in her eyes.

"This morning, Eddie was talking to me about having a family." She whispered.

Fabian's eyes widened, although she couldn't see. Sadness passed over his features.

"He said he was ready. Said he loved me, and that one day, I might even be KT Miller. He made this stupid joke too. I said KT Miller had a ring to it. He decided to be smart and said that, of course, it'd have two. He was a bloody idiot. But he was my idiot. I love him, Fabian. I love him so much. It feels like every single part of me is just breaking into a million pieces and right now, it feels like being happy is a long, long way away. I don't know how long that road is but I know that I can barely get two steps without Eddie." She whispered. "I wish it was different, I do. But the fact is that he made me happier than anything else. I don't know how I can go on without him there with his jokes and his pranks and his encouragement. He was the person I could imagine growing old with – you know I hate imagining all that. Thing is, Fabian, I imagined it being the four of us together too. Almost exactly the way you said it, I imagined it too. Maybe that's why. Life thought that we were both asking for too much and it decided to change the road. Fate can be a lovely lady but damn...she can also be a bitch."

Silence fell between them again. Then, in unison, they both said the exact same thing that had been on their minds for a while. The one thing that was making everything so much harder. It was weighing them both down like a boulder.

"I didn't get to say goodbye."


	4. Chapter 4

Fabian was awoken by the irritating sound of the house phone ringing. He and KT had fallen asleep on the sofa, and she, too, was stirring, groaning.

His eyes felt heavy and his eyelashes were spiky, sticking together slightly from the previous night's tears. He gently untangled himself from KT and reached for the phone, picking it up with his shaky hands.

"Hello?" he asked, as he answered the call.

"Fabes!" a familiar voice said.

"Joy?" he replied. Normally, he'd be delighted to hear from his old friend. But right now, he felt as though he were void from any emotion but sadness. It was creeping in on him from all sides and it was trapping him. It was like being in a tunnel and not being able to see the light at the end.

"Is KT with you?" she asked frantically. "She went to the police station yesterday and she didn't get back to me, I was so worried, I-"

"Joy, she's here." Fabian said, smiling weakly at KT.

"It's so awful, isn't it?" Joy whispered. "About Eddie."

"Joy..." Fabian murmured. "He...he and Nina...were in the same car..."

Silence.

"Oh my god." Joy whispered. "Fabian, I am so so sorry."

Fabian could only let out a broken sob in reply, all the emotion from last night coming back to haunt him all over again. A similar sob echoed from KT's lips as she shifted closer to him, linking her arm through his and leaning her head on his shoulder. Fabian's head rested against hers and he closed his eyes.

"D-do you need anything?" Joy asked shakily.

"I don't know...I can't think straight." Fabian murmured.

"Look. Patricia and Alfie are back from Ireland...I'll go get them, and we'll come over. KT's left her address book here so I know where to go." Joy said.

"Okay. See you soon, Joy." Fabian replied, and hung up, putting the phone back. "Alfie and Patricia are back. She'll bring them over."

KT nodded and got to her feet. She looked so small – her hair was a mess, her eyes puffy, and she was shaking. "Coffee?" she asked.

He smiled weakly once more. "That'd be great."

She smiled back, even if it was only a small smile, and she headed into the kitchen. She poured water into the kettle and left it to boil, looking out of the kitchen window as she waited. There was a light breeze outside, rustling leaves as it passed through them. The sky was somewhat cloudy, and the sun was hidden behind a very dark cloud. She vaguely heard Fabian lighting the fire and turning on the heaters.

She found herself remembering the last time she, Fabian, Eddie and Nina had met up, on a day very similar to this.

" _It's going to rain!" KT called out, as Nina and Eddie rushed ahead with the picnic baskets._

" _You Americans really don't get deterred, do you?" Fabian commented to KT._

" _I'm trying to stay behind here!" KT retorted, with a laugh._

" _Hurry up!" Nina called._

" _We'll eat the food without you otherwise!" Eddie warned._

 _KT rolled her eyes, smiling fondly. "Idiots." She commented._

" _They are." Fabian agreed, grabbing her hand and dragging her along as he ran to catch up with the others. They were at their favourite park. By the time the two caught up, Nina and Eddie had already laid out the blanket on top of a hill, under a large tree, and they were busy getting out rocks to hold down the blanket._

 _KT looked at the tree thoughtfully. She knew she had a few minutes before they got the picnic food out, so she figured she may as well do something. Stepping away from Fabian, she took a running jump and clung on to a tree branch. It was thick enough for her to sit on, she mused. She pulled herself up quickly, and decided to go higher._

" _KT, what are you doing?" Nina asked, giggling._

" _Climbing!" she called back, as she pulled herself higher._

" _That much I got. But why?" Nina asked._

" _Fun!" KT laughed._

" _You're gonna break your neck!" Eddie warned._

" _Chance would be a fine thing, Mr Miller!" she called, rolling her eyes as she sat on the highest tree branch._

" _Get down here!" Eddie exclaimed._

" _Give me a minute, would you? I just want to admire the view." KT grinned._

" _I'm certainly admiring the view." Eddie commented._

 _Her cheeks went crimson. Nina laughed and Fabian facepalmed._

" _Eddie!" KT exclaimed. "Just get the food ready, would you?"_

 _He saluted and went to help Nina and Fabian setting up. KT cast her eye over the park, which looked beautiful from the height she was at. A smile graced her features and she wondered how some people couldn't see the beauty of the world. She could see birds flying in the sky, higher than she could ever get, and she heard them tweeting to each other as they travelled. She heard the laughter of children from way further down, the chatter of parents, the rushing of cars as they passed by, the rustle of leaves as a breeze passed over them...it was all beautiful in it's very own way, and KT could never get tired of it._

 _She began to climb down as carefully as she could. However, on the last branch, she slipped and fell, although luckily, Fabian was there to break her fall._

" _Ow." He muttered, as he fell back, KT on top of him._

" _Sorry!" she laughed, looking flustered as she got off him and sat on the blanket. He sat up too, laughing._

 _Nina and Eddie were snickering quietly to themselves. "You're dorks." Nina announced._

" _And proud." They said in unison._

 _Eddie smirked. "Honestly, you could be soulmates." He teased._

" _Yeah, we are. We've been secretly dating for a while now." KT joked._

" _And we're planning on running off into the sunset together once the picnic is over." Fabian added._

 _Nina just laughed. "Don't fall over whilst running, Fabes."_

 _He rolled his eyes, but smiled fondly. "You're not the kindest to me, are you, Nina?"_

" _Oh, come on." Nina said. "I've said worse."_

" _Yeah, I bet you have." Eddie smirked._

" _I feel excluded." KT said, pouting._

" _It's okay, KT, we still have each other." Fabian joked, wrapping an arm around her._

The click of the kettle, signifying it was ready, brought KT out of her flashback with a start. The house had warmed up considerably, and she realized Fabian was in the room. She had tears in her eyes. Remembering was painful.

"I was thinking about that day, too." He said quietly.

He knew her so well.

She began making the coffee, making sure to leave out a few cups for Patricia, Alfie and Joy.

Speaking of, the doorbell rang out shortly after KT had made Fabian's coffee as well as her own. She began making Alfie's, Patricia's and Joy's as Fabian went to answer the door.

The coffee was done as soon as they walked into the living room. KT was setting it down when she spotted them. She made sure she'd put everything down before she straightened up.

Tears filled Patricia's eyes as she rushed forward to hug KT. Although the two had been off to a rough start, they were rather close these days. And both KT and Fabian needed their friends right now. Joy and Alfie hugged KT as well, and then Fabian. They all sat down, sipping at their coffees.

"It's so awful." Joy murmured.

"How...how did it happen, again?" Alfie asked.

"Alfie!" Patricia scolded.

"No...it's okay." Fabian murmured.

"They were hit by a lorry that flunked a red light." KT said softly. "They...they died instantly."

Patricia bit her lip, Joy closed her eyes, and Alfie's face had pain written all over it.

"I'm so sorry." Alfie muttered.

"It's okay, Alfie." KT replied.

"I just...how are you feeling?" Joy asked.

KT looked at Fabian. "Numb." She murmured.

He nodded in agreement.

"So it hasn't...set in yet?" Patricia suggested, trying to be gentle. It wasn't her forte, granted, but she was trying, and that counted.

"Not completely." Fabian replied, sipping at his coffee. Honestly, he was dreading the moment that it did finally hit him properly. If it hurt now, how would he feel then?

They all sat in silence for a while. After all, what could they say? There weren't enough ways to say that they were sorry for KT and Fabian's loss. Even if there were, however, all three of their friends knew that it was an overused phrase, and apologizing wasn't going to make it better. However, there wasn't much else to say.

"Have...have you guys thought about funerals?" Joy asked.

Everyone winced.

"God, I'm sorry." Joy muttered, after a short pause. "That was so horrible of me. Forget I asked."

"I...I think we should make them have a joint funeral." Fabian said, looking at KT.

She nodded. "I think that's...a good idea." She said. "But not just yet."

"No." Fabian agreed. "We need to wait at least a little while. A few weeks, at least."

"Well, we're back for good now." Patricia told them. "So any time works for us."

"We can get everyone else from Anubis House there. And their families, of course." Joy added.

There was so much to plan – music, reception, flowers, seating, speeches...although funerals and weddings were very different, they were similar in the fact that they took planning. And in the fact that they needed quite a few of the same things. For different reasons.

"What are you going to do about the house?" Patricia asked Fabian.

"I don't know. Every inch of it has a memory, and I'm not sure how long I'm going to be able to deal with that." He admitted. "But for now, there's not much I can do. There's a lot of stuff I need to handle first, and then after that, I'll focus on stuff like me and the house."

It was a good plan, and they all knew it.

KT reached over and squeezed his hand in hers. Fabian knew, 100%, that he didn't have to go through this alone.

He loved all his friends, but only KT really understood him.

* * *

Once Joy, Alfie and Patricia had left, Fabian found KT clearing up the plates and such they'd all used when eating.

"You don't have to do that, you know." Fabian said softly.

"I know. I figured...I figured I'd help out some before going home." KT replied.

She didn't want to go home. She didn't want to be there alone. But she also didn't want to bother Fabian too much. He was having the same dilemma – he didn't want her to leave, but he didn't want to bother her by asking her to stay. They'd been through a lot and neither were sure if the other wanted them to stay any longer than they had.

"You...you know..you don't have to leave..." Fabian murmured. "If you want to stay, you can, is what I mean. Obviously, if you want to go, then that's fine by me, but the offer is there if you want it..." he trailed off.

KT put down the dishes she was holding, turned around, and flung her arms around his form without a word. He hugged her back, relaxing immediately and gently rubbing her back. Relief flooded through both of them.

"Thanks, Fabian." KT murmured, after a few moments.

"No, thank _you_." He replied. "I didn't want to be alone."

"Well neither did I." She countered.

"You can have my bed tonight, okay?" Fabian told her gently.

"What about you?"

"I'll take the couch."

"No, I can't make you do that."

"It's fine, honestly."

"Why don't we share the bed?"

Fabian's eyes widened ever so slightly. Although he knew she meant nothing by it, he was still a little surprised. She flushed.

"I didn't...I didn't mean..." she began.

"N-no, I know." Fabian said. "I'm just a little surprised. But it's better than arguing over who sleeps where, so...yeah, we'll share the bed."

KT smiled weakly. She wasn't sure if she could even stomach sleeping alone, so the idea of having comfort – as she had the night before – was greatly appreciated.

"Let's go, then." Fabian smiled, gently taking her hand in his.


End file.
